Financial Independence: A Woman’s Act of Protest and Power
Women's History Month: The Power of Financial Preparedness
March is Women’s History Month, a time to celebrate the strength, resilience, and achievements of women throughout history. As we step into this month, I want to start by sharing something deeply personal—something I wish I had learned much earlier in life: financial preparedness.
I got married at 16 and spent 28 years in a marriage where I had no say in our financial life. I was given a set amount for groceries and essentials, but beyond that, I was completely in the dark. I didn’t know what our bills were, what my husband made, or how to manage money on my own. So when I found myself single again, I was thrown into a world I knew nothing about.
The learning curve was steep. There were moments when I felt completely lost—nights spent under the covers, crying, overwhelmed by things I felt I should have known. In my 40s, I was asking for basic financial advice, feeling embarrassed that I was just now learning things I thought I should have mastered decades earlier. And yes, I made mistakes—plenty of them.
But here’s the thing: I kept going. And what I’ve realized is that financial independence isn’t just about numbers in a bank account; it’s about confidence, knowledge, and reclaiming control over your life.
So, as we honor Women’s History Month, I want to shine a light on financial empowerment. Because every woman deserves to understand, control, and feel secure in her financial future—no matter where she’s starting from
The Phone Call That Changed Everything
There are moments in life that shift your entire perspective—sometimes, they come when you least expect them. For me, it was a simple phone call.
I was having one of those days. You know the kind—where self-doubt creeps in, where the weight of the world feels unbearable. I was feeling like a failure, consumed by the fear that I wasn’t enough. And then, my son called.
He heard it in my voice immediately. "What’s wrong?" he asked. Hesitant but honest, I told him how I felt. That’s when he stopped me, mid-sentence, and said something I’ll never forget:
“I never want to hear you say that again.”
He didn’t just dismiss my feelings—he challenged them. He ran through the facts of my life, not as I saw them in my moment of despair, but as he saw them with pride. He reminded me of how far I had come, how much I had accomplished, and how, in his eyes, I was an example to all women.
That conversation changed the course of my financial life. It wasn’t just about me anymore. I wasn’t doing this for myself—I was doing it for every teenage girl who got married young and dedicated her life to her family, only to be told one day that it wasn’t enough. For every woman who woke up to financial devastation, feeling lost and powerless. I was determined to prove that rebuilding was possible, so she would know she could do it too.
It hasn’t been easy. There have been moments of doubt, exhaustion, and fear. But there has also been power—an unshakable belief that I am capable. That we, as women, are capable.
That phone call was a turning point, a reminder that sometimes, when we can’t see our own strength, we need someone we love to remind us of it. And when they do, we have to believe them.
“We live in a patriarchal world—a system that aids and abets inequality. In this system that has gatekept financial information and tools from marginalized groups, it is an act of protest to be financially independent. It is an act of protest to overcome negative beliefs about money in order to save, pay off debt, invest, and find fulfilling work. It is an act of protest to prioritize rest instead of hustle, abundance rather than scarcity, and generosity in place of stockpiling. In a world that actively works to keep us playing small, it is an act of protest to be stable, content, and powerful.”
― Tori Dunlap, Financial Feminist: Overcome the Patriarchy's Bullsh*t to Master Your Money and Build a Life You Love
So here are some things that I have done that have helped. The main one being changing my mindset.
Financial Planning Is Self-Care
We often think of self-care as spa days, bubble baths, or cozy nights in—but have you ever considered that financial planning is a form of self-care too? When you’re single, you are in full control of your finances. That’s empowering, but it can also be overwhelming, especially when life gets busy. It’s easy to put financial well-being on the back burner, but having a plan in place isn’t just about staying on track with your goals—it’s about choosing yourself.
The first step? Define what’s important to you. Set both short-term and long-term goals that align with your vision for your life. Then, build a financial plan that helps guide your saving and spending.
Personally, I dedicate an evening at the end of every month to review my finances and prepare for what’s ahead. I ask myself:
- Are there birthdays coming up?
- Do I need an oil change?
- Is it time to treat myself to a facial?
- What debt needs to be paid off?
But here’s the game-changer—I make it a ritual rather than a chore. I light candles, play fun music, and pull out my ledger. What once felt scary now feels freeing. And when I’m done? I reward myself. Maybe it’s a relaxing bath, a glass of wine, or dinner out—something small but meaningful to reinforce that taking control of my finances is a gift to myself.
So, if money talk makes you anxious, try reframing it. Financial planning isn’t about restriction—it’s about creating the life you want. And that? That’s self-care at its finest.
“We have to develop a healthy, honest relationship with our money. And we have to see this relationship as a reflection of our relationship with ourselves.”
― Suze Orman, Women & Money: Owning the Power to Control Your Destiny
Build a Stronger Safety Net: Saving for Emergencies
When you’re a proud household of one, you are your own backup plan. That independence is empowering, but it also means preparing for the unexpected falls solely on your shoulders. A layoff, a major car repair, or an unforeseen medical bill can quickly become stressful if you don’t have a financial cushion.
The general rule of thumb is to save 3–6 months’ worth of essential living expenses in an emergency fund. But if you’re single, aiming for the higher end of that range might give you more peace of mind. That said, there’s no one-size-fits-all number—your savings goal should reflect your personal situation and what makes you feel secure.
Saving three months’ worth of expenses might sound daunting, but remember: small, consistent savings add up. One of the easiest ways to build your emergency fund is to set up automated transfers from your paycheck straight into a dedicated savings account. Look for an account that’s easily accessible but also earns interest, so your money is growing while it sits there waiting for a rainy day.
Think of it this way: Your emergency fund is like a safety net you are weaving for yourself—one that allows you to handle life’s surprises with confidence rather than panic. And that kind of financial security? It’s priceless
Women Live Longer—Here’s How to Plan for It
On average, women live six years longer than men. That’s six extra years to travel, pursue passions, and enjoy life. But it also means we need to plan ahead so we don’t outlive our retirement savings.
If you’re a single woman, whether by choice or circumstance, taking charge of your financial future is even more important. Here are a few key retirement considerations to keep in mind:
💰 Day-to-Day Living Expenses
As a single person, your cost of living may be higher, and those expenses don’t just disappear when you retire. If you’re newly single heading into retirement, you may need to adjust to budgeting on one income and fine-tune your financial plan accordingly.
🏥 Health Care & Long-Term Care Costs
Women, on average, spend 20% more on health care throughout their lives, including in retirement. Single women are also more likely to need long-term care, which can be a major expense. Planning for both health care and assisted living costs early can help protect your financial security.
📌 Social Security Considerations
Your Social Security income can be affected by divorce or the loss of a spouse, so it’s essential to have a strategy. You may benefit from delaying your claim to maximize your lifetime payout. If you were married for 10 years or more, you may also be eligible to receive Social Security benefits based on your ex-spouse’s earnings—something worth looking into when planning for retirement.
The bottom line? Longevity is a gift, but financial preparation is key. The sooner you start planning, the more freedom you’ll have to enjoy your golden years on your terms.
Why Single Women Shouldn’t Overlook Life Insurance
Life insurance might not be at the top of your financial to-do list—especially if you don’t have a partner or children depending on you. But just because you don’t have a spouse to leave it to doesn’t mean it’s not worth considering. A life insurance policy can provide peace of mind, ensuring that the people who matter most—whether that’s family, close friends, or business partners—are financially protected if something happens to you.
If you’ve been thinking about buying a policy, don’t wait too long. Life insurance (and long-term care insurance) premiums tend to increase with age. Plus, developing certain health conditions could not only drive up costs but also make you ineligible for coverage altogether.
One important note: If you’ve survived an abusive relationship and have a diagnosis of PTSD or CPTSD, some insurance companies may deny coverage. That’s why it’s essential to research policies and providers carefully before applying.
At the end of the day, life insurance isn’t just about leaving money behind—it’s about taking control of your financial future and making sure the people you care about are supported, no matter what.
Estate Planning: A Gift of Love and Peace of Mind
Estate planning might not be the most exciting topic, but it’s one of the most important—especially for single women. It’s not just about dividing assets; it’s about protecting your wishes, your loved ones, and your legacy.
An estate plan is a set of legal decisions and documents that help ensure everything is handled according to your wishes. It can include:
✅ A will to outline how your assets should be distributed
✅ A health care proxy to ensure someone you trust can make medical decisions if you’re unable to
✅ A power of attorney for financial and legal matters
✅ Trusts, account records, insurance policies, and beneficiary designations
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Estate planning can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to figure it out alone. Working with an attorney helped me create a trust that ensures my kids—and future grandchildren—are taken care of when I’m gone. Knowing that they won’t have to deal with legal headaches or financial stress during an already emotional time gives me incredible peace of mind.
At the end of the day, estate planning isn’t just a financial decision—it’s an act of love. It’s the most meaningful way I can take care of my family, even after I’m no longer here. If you’ve been putting it off, consider this your sign to start. Your future self—and your loved ones—will thank you.
You’re Not Alone—And You Can Do This
I know it feels overwhelming, and I know the fear can be paralyzing. I’ve been there. I remember the first time I faced the deep financial wounds I had been carrying, and it was like staring at an impossible mountain. But then, I was blessed with the kindness of two incredible people—my bosses, Mark and Gina—who sat with me as tears streamed down my face. Mark looked at me, with such gentle encouragement, and said, “You can do this. We have faith in you. Just slow down, you’re doing great.”
That moment of grace—of someone believing in me when I couldn’t believe in myself—changed everything. I will forever be grateful to them for their patience, their kindness, and for showing me that I wasn’t alone in this.
And now, looking back on how far I’ve come, I want you to know this: You will get there too. One step at a time. Trust yourself, have faith, and keep moving forward, even when it feels hard. Growth isn’t always easy, but oh, it’s always worth it.
So, take a deep breath, focus on the next small, right thing you can do—and know that I’m cheering you on every step of the way. You’ve got this, and I believe in you.
“Give a woman a dollar, and she can put it to good use. Teach her about how money really works, and she can change the world,”
— Linda Davis Taylor, CEO and Chairman of Clifford Swan Investment Counselors.
